The Spirit In Me

My old self has been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. So I live in this earthly body by trusting the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. ~Galatians 2:20

Letting God Lead

One of my fondest memories is ballroom dancing. It was something I fell into after my last two children left home. I was alone for the first time in my life and had no idea what to do with myself. A friend from work took me to a club that had a ballroom night every Tuesday with a free lesson and a dance party. First we would sit and watch, and soon we joined in. It was wonderful. It brought me such happiness and I became a regular. It didn't matter how good I was, it was fun and I felt like a different person. It lead to years of many events and dances.

That was several years ago. Now I have illness that not only took away my ability to dance, but also to go for walks. Life is very different. Living with a chronic illness had caused me to grieve, get depressed, get angry and feel negative. Dancing is one of many things that I no longer have the ability to do. 

This illness has also brought me to my knees in complete surrender. There is nothing better than learning to lay all of one's burdens at the cross. In doing this, I have experienced a freedom and peace that I never had before. Although human nature drives me to take back the weight of those burdens, the practice of laying it all down before Christ is something I would encourage everyone to do. 

I do this over and over again, and it has brought me so much closer to God, and I have found the joy that comes from being so connected to our Heavenly Father. Joy comes from inside and cannot be taken away. It can be experienced in all circumstances and I am so thankful to have found it.

I miss ballroom dancing, I always will. Now when I want to dance, my husband and I slow dance in the livingroom, and there is something very special about that. God is taking the person I am now; the person I am supposed to be, and molding me into the better person He wants me to become. Through this experience, I have become more flexible.

When I look deep inside, I can see that for every loss there has been a gain. I believe He takes our losses and uses them for the good. I am grateful for the experiences I had before my illness, but I am also grateful for the peace and joy that God has produced in me. Yes, there are still hard days. Now I have the tools to cope with the hard days and I have an appreciation for life and all that is in it that I didn't have before.

What have you had trouble letting go of? Have you found new to replace the old? How do you handle the hard days? Let us hear from you in the comments below! 

And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. ~Romans 8:28