Saturday, September 23, 2017
They are called filters, the lens through which we see the world. We commonly refer to romantics as seeing through rose colored glasses, or depressed people as "seeing through a dark veil." I have found that the mood and frame of mind I'm in affects how I experience what is happening in a day. It all comes down to perspective.
When I first was diagnosed with my illnesses I was scared. They were rare and I didn't know a lot about them. Information wasn't easy to find. I thought of myself as very sick, and consequently noticed every single ache and pain. I forgot about the normal aches and pains we all experience. I was looking for what was wrong.
When I found acceptance not only of my illness but of where I am presently, with the help of God, my thinking and my filters started to change. Although my doctors didn't give me hope of a full recovery, my Lord does. Instead of thinking of myself as being sick, I try to think of myself as getting well. While that may not mean I will be fully healed in this life time, I look for what is okay or getting better instead of what is worse. When the pain is bad, I put it in the context of a bad pain day, meaning tomorrow may be better. Looking for the good, and thinking positively, shines a bright light on my illnesses, instead of feeling like i am walking a dark, lonely path.
Changing one's perspective can even impact how you feel physically. It doesn't change having an illness, but it can certainly contribute to overall quality of life and how much pain you feel. For me, it has meant letting go of self-sufficiency and depending on God and those He chooses to work through. That has been difficult for me, but along with the letting go has come a freedom to change and grow, and the humility to ask for help. Maybe that is a new beginning in itself.