The idea of being the perfect mother died shortly after my first child was born along with many ideas I had about child rearing. I had no idea what I was doing. Everyone had advice for me, and they all had different answers. I really didn't want their answers, I wanted their support, their belief in me. I cherished the early years of having my babies; I had three children, two boys and a girl, all born within five years. When they were little, I was young and on the floor with them. They were great times. Then life got hard. So many times there were no good answers and I just said a prayer and did the best I could. Was it right? Not always but sometimes. Was I a great mother? Probably not, definitely not the mother I dreamed I would be. As mothers, we only have control over what we do, not circumstances that are created by others; certainly not decisions our children make when we are not around.
"Can a woman forget her nursing child, that she should have no compassion on the son of her womb?" ~Isaiah 49:15
So I grew as a Christian, as a woman and as a person while my kids grew up. In hind sight, I see that we learn from what we see in people, not from what they say. I hope my children learned some good things from me since I was their example. I was finding my deeper relationship with God while they were in their teens. Trying to handle tragedies within our family, they also got to watch me under fire as well. Did I always pass the test? I am sure there were times I did not. But I always loved them unconditionally. I always tried to let them know that they were loved no matter what. And I always prayed boldly for my children.
"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me." ~ Phillipians 3:12